Stated the way it should be - the online journal of Brian Wong

goodbye.

2008-05-05T13:02:00.003+08:00

boxed out

2008-04-28T02:07:00.004+08:00

time to move on.

2008-04-25T00:58:00.002+08:00

yeah. precisely. after all this time..i think.. it's best that i do try even harder to move on.. everyday passes by and im getting more and more convinced that she's never gonna see me that way.. no matter how much i love her.. look..if she thinks she can't stand dating guys her age...makes me wonder how many guys her age she has dated for her to make a statement like that. does the guy she's "seeing" at the moment a bastion of maturity at almost 30? ive been told otherwise by she herself. when it comes to maturity its not about the age.. in fact the older people are the more stubborn ones because they already think theyre all that and "matured" isnt it? here i am, keeping quiet about how i feel, trying to be the big brother around the house, trying my best to take care of both the girls.. and i still get statements like that thrown in my face.. she probably has her own justifications for making such a sweeping statement but oh well i cant help but feel a little offended..i guess. she probably doesnt know or care that she did anyway..

other statements like "i think its weird that good friends get together romantically" also convince me that.. i am wasting my time.. though good friends know each other best..thats why when they get together..they really do love each other for who they are.. and isnt that the best thing that can happen? otherwise it'd just be testing unknown waters not knowing what ul get just because it feels "weird if its my good friend". im sorry. im not writing for an audience to read, im just rambling and venting because this is the only place i can..hopefully i can look back on these posts and have a good laugh at it.. oh well. i guess its time to move on..but can i?

---

2008-04-19T22:30:00.003+08:00

i hope i dont regret posting what i just did........ i just needed to get it off my chest with this being the only outlet usable..i guess ive become good at hiding feelings and intentions.. with the occasional silent outburst..blessing or curse il take it i guess. whoever that read all this and knows who i'm talking about, please do me a little favor and hold your silence...it is appreciated.

What do you do when..you don't know what to do.

2008-04-19T20:51:00.005+08:00

football: the new season is here!

2007-08-09T00:34:00.000+08:00

WHOHHHH i can't wait for the new season to start. as a MANCHESTER UNITED fan since i was a kid, naturally now i would be drooling just thinking about the prospect of Nani, Anderson and Hargreaves playing in our already explosive team. wonderful, wonderful. They play the best and most entertaining football. Chelsea is a load of shit. Liverpool? well they keep saying before every season that its going to be their year.. but.. here's what i think.

Ahh.. there you go. Even I have to agree with chelsea fans on this. COME ON LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!

A BIG QUESTION

2007-08-08T23:52:00.000+08:00

why do people always yearn for those who don't give them what they want or deserve yet fail to appreciate those who do, those who are there..I ain't shitting here. I'm guilty of this.. and i'm sure many, many others are too. Rationality argues that you should appreciate and love those more doesn't it. Something's amiss here. Ahh. i got it. feelings. I would describe it like a msian : "damn cibai wan la!" I feel concerned for those who don't warrant it, and desiring for those that I KNOW not so deep inside that i shouldn't. At the same time, there are some around me which have been so very nice, and i want to show my appreciation for those people..

one of these "people" is N. now N..is really not your everyday girl. I've known her for ..7 years? but only recently she's been showing me what kind of a person she truly is. Caring, reckless, kind and quiet. Not a very common combination methinks. Once she even sneaked her dad's car out and came to my house at 2am just to keep me company. Wonderful huh. and yes, to those people that think i'm all about pussy i did not touch her. she touched me though. it was marvellous, the massage. hahah. so yes .. you know who you are. Glad i kept in touch with you..you're cool. :)

updates!

2007-08-08T23:35:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry I have not updated in ages, due to the fact i just .. didnt feel literaturely inspired. I just got back from the curve, after having drinks with a few peeps i haven't been able to see in ages : denesh,vincent,zehan,shiv,leroy and hannah. I've seen zamir around of course, spent a night at his recently just talking, watching movies and smoking. Great fun. Seeing those faces really reminded me how much I missed them..especially some of them. Then I just lost my mood for talking and smiling..halfway during the drink session and became quiet.. and left shortly after. I don't know why I acted or felt the way I did.. its just one of those days I guess. or is it? I really don't wanna continue pondering about that. ANYWAY, I can't wait to get back to college. I also can't wait to get out of my house. My parents, particularly my mother has been driving me up the wall recently. Whenever she opens her mouth it's to say something about what I am not, what i should be, what others are, and what would be ideal.. i can never seem to have a normal conversation with her no matter how much i try..Guess i can't blame myself for not really wanting to talk to her. She comes into my room, i go out to the garden. She follows, i go in. Hope she got some kind of message. -.-

Thank you.

2007-07-15T05:09:00.000+08:00

To all those who wished me happy birthday a week ago, i know its a lil late but its never too late to say thanks ..right.

The first who wished : my aunt. thank you. i know you love me tons and i dont do much in return cept playing truant during church camp and making my mother go bonkers, but thank you.

My dad: you remembered this year. congrats. Mom has yet to wish me though. Thanks for being such a cool dad and warning me against continuing to smoke instead of doing it mom-style.

Zamir: my foos taikor, the most emo guy in HELP college, my lepak partner when everybody disappears, thanks. I appreciate all the meals, foos games u spent me and the times we bonded.

Lester: Thanks for being the Only friend present when the clock hit 12. Known u 7-8 years, never disliked you in anyway and i dont think i will ever even if i try to. You the man.

Jennyung: What can i say man. Despite a fallout, i can't seem to stay away from you. Thanks for being one of the most supportive friends..yet being consistently full of shit..life=wont be the same without you you skinny lil boy of 23. Thanks for the beer.

Rachel: Without you college would be such a drag. Without you i'd have much more headaches ( like literally, since yr a dam good head massager)..and without you i'd be unable to prove that a guy and girl can be such good friends without being more and yet be so much better than a couple, the way we are ;)

Shiv: I think your birthday sms was the longest..i'm glad you regard me as a great friend..but i have to say the opposite about you. No i'm just kidding, like always. Maybe i shud stop..and u'd take me more seriously..maybe. I'm not gonna tell anyone more abt the stunt, so it remains a funny but cool memory. See you at college.

ThebunchofguysfromSamad: Incher,Panda,Josh,Bernard,Edwin,Tony,Liang,Marvin,Jin..anymore? shit there's so many of us..its great how each and every1 of us are from different colleges yet we see each other everyday. To the jenns,tony: thanks for all the rides back..if i had to pay u in petrol cash i probably wouldve been very much indebt. Thanks incher for letting me insult you shamelessly you temperless bitch(sorry). To the rest of you, you guys are my soulmates man. No girl ever gonna replace you fuckers. Gonna love you guys for life. Too many good memories to state. But we all know don't we. and Jin, thank you..for being you.

Hamster: Yes my brother. Long gone were the days we argued til you lost with mum's help. You are so different from me yet I we get along better than most siblings, very grateful for that. Thanks for the birthday Fags.

PuiKar: SORRY! i didnt add you here earlier.. just a slip of my mind because its been a week..you know i still sayang you :p lol. Never quite met another girl like you, so hyper, so gullible..but you can be the best friend ever. We should catch up soon.

Kevindra: You emo indian. Life would never be the same without you because i'd never find someone as hopeless as you when it comes to girls: therefore less laughs. hahah kiddin..Get yourself a car mate. You'd think i'd be sick of you after spending every class every year in high school with you..surprisingly i'm not. You must be special. lol.

Denesh: College hengtai. lol. Thanks for the rides as well. Without you i'd have no one to help me hand up my assignments because i never go for class and fortunately you do. Thanks. You've been a great friend.

Eemay,Nicole,ShiaoJeeng,ChunWai,Waiyi,Petrina,Zuranee,WenFei, Jasmine, Navvii, Zehan, Naveen, Kahar, Nicholas: Even after a week i still remember your wishes. Thank you all...you people fill up everything else.and also thanks Nat and Sarika for the belated wishes..and anyone else i forgot to mention..

nothing is real til its gone.

2007-07-15T04:38:00.000+08:00

A person is judged by the decisions he/she makes. True? I think so. Today is one of those days where I sit back and come to think of the person that is me. Am I where I want to be? Am I the person I think should be? I just had to reject a person, a person whom i believe to have not much significance in my life, only to realize and reflect back on the first sentence of this post. Confused? I nearly am myself. Therefore rather than think with my balls, I preferred to think with the tool that God gave me specifically for Thinking. My brain. At this age, friends are the best and biggest influence in our lives, they're a huge part in my life, bigger than my family..for me at least. Anything more than that, is just a hindrance. So why, God why..do I have feelings for another girl. I, the preacher of anti "onenitism", the loser who has never had a satisfying relationship, plus all the unpleasant experiences coming from the opposite sex, have hit rock bottom. When I reflect back on my life, I guess i've made many many mistakes and I have had to repeatedly tell myself :

Mistakes made me who I am now. I can't say im proud of myself, yet the people around me always seem to think I hold myself in great esteem. so why do I always end up at the same place? I am not misunderstood, nor am I hating life..am I that directionless? If i am, someone save me..I am not sure that this post made much sense, perhaps its just pieces of jargle from my head placed together on an improper jigsaw puzzle. I guess its just the need for me to transfer all those thoughts in my head..

Review: Transformers

2007-07-08T05:43:00.000+08:00

Last night, I finally got the chance to watch the eagerly anticipated movie of the summer : transformers. Even though the cinema was almost sold out, I bought a single ticket for myself and joined a friend who already had one in the cinema. To be honest, when the movie was first introduced, long before it was released, I didn't think much of robots saving the world. I thought it would be another ruining of a once-popular franchise i.e.: hulk, the punisher.. However, when it was released every person I knew who came back from the movies after watching it gave it nothing but the thumbs up, increasing my curiosity. In the end I just had to watch it to see what the fuss is all about.
Well the fuss is this: This show KICKS ass. Better than all the "3"s. (spiderman, shrek,..) Despite a very limited story line, the director Michael Bay managed to give us 2 and a half hours of eye opening scenes. The CGI graphics-amazing would be an understatement. Even some of the lines were funny. The acting was surpringly well done, coupled with the action scenes of giant robots going at it in a city, destroying buildings and killing innocents made this a show not easily forgotten. Not to mention Megan Fox (wooooooo..). She would catch the eye of anyone who had a penis. Anyway. over all its one of the "must-watch"es of the summer, if not the best. CHECK IT OUT!
pros: the graphics-jaw dropping. Structure's good as well, will keep you on the edge of yr seat for most of the show. Recommended to be watched in the cinema for the full effect of the movie, not on some crummy DVD.
cons: a storyline that is limited and leaves a few questions..but the action rate is so quick you wouldn't care anyway. 4/5!

Pwned.

2007-07-06T03:08:00.000+08:00

Today....was a fine day. Exams are over. Free time is here. I celebrated my freedom by taking part in The One Foosball challenge in OU..I wasn't too optimistic about it to be honest because the event i joined would be full of gay pros. Needless to say with my luck, me and zamir (my partner) drew one of the gayest opponents of them all..and they appeared in the large forms of Ikhi and Boboy(i think thats how its spelt) and during the match, me being me, having trouble with nerves as usual, didn't help things. So you can guess what happened.

Well yeah. A celebration indeed. I've decided i'l try to temporarily stop foos, at least for a few days..too much of anything can be bad for you..

the big 2

2007-07-04T00:43:00.001+08:00

"a picture speaks a thousand words"

- i agree

"I won't break"

2007-07-03T05:13:00.000+08:00

is finally completed. The first of Aural Joint's upcoming 3 tracks which are scheduled for joint release, sounds horrible. However, mixing has not been done, and it'l probably sound really much much better-without JD's singing. His part in the backup vocals destroyed the entire song in my opinion after hearing it on my own system. In his studio, with the nice big posh speakers everything sounded nice. What a con. No offense to him though, he actually CAN sing. Damn its 5 in the morning, recording really kills time. Great experience though.. Malaysia needs more serious music-makers. I'd encourage anyone who is reading this that has some musical talent exploit it. Those who don't, well.. keep supporting the local music industry. It is still in it's fledgling stage and will need everybody's support. The next track scheduled for recording would be "fly", and will commence in exactly a week's time. Besides this, today was the first day of my semester finals, it went pretty well i guess. After thursday 10 a.m., I'l be free to pursue life's leisures for 40-or-so days. Not. I have to find a job. Any recommendations?

FINALS!

2007-07-02T02:15:00.000+08:00

yes. the wonderful end of another semester is here. What do I have to reflect on the past 7 weeks of education? Its been pretty different lecturers for both my classes but with similar results. One class, lectured by the very animated and sudden Zan, who also happens to be rachel's boyfriend's cousin, and the other by the extremely horridly boring Melinda who looks like one of those Mahjong Aunties, complete with jade jewellry. However, my results this semester have been surprisingly uplifting, surely to raise my cgpa at least by a little. I feel good about myself :D. First paper's a few hours away, though im not at the very least feeling any form of anxiety. In fact, my silly mind is wandering all over the place, pathetically wishing for the appearance of my truly-elusive significant other when i'm alone. I think it's called the Inertia theory. My relationship ball hasn't stopped rolling since i ended my past serious relationship with G i guess. Not that i miss her, it's just the void that's left there. Guess it's just the way i was too used to having a girl there..especially after i heard about a friend's fairy-tale like story where he gets to hook up with that someone he's been wanting for such a damn long time. PATHETIC. So not the image i'm trying to project lol. Also on my mind is none other than the foos tournie happening in OU at the end of this week. Rookie doubles here i come. Zamir, well said. Lets hustle :) . Hope my shot doesn't die on me though.

An interactive post.

2007-06-29T00:57:00.000+08:00

The holidays are coming up. I'm going to have lots of free time. Of course i'l get a job, but besides that i'l still have some time to spare. So, i'm going to want to do something beneficial for myself. Call it personal development..maybe. Thing is, i've a few things in mind and I can't do them all, so if you guys dont mind i'd like some feedback as to which I should pursue.

a. Give drum lessons(i know i'm not fully qualified to be a teacher but I can certainly teach =) )
b. Read a bunch of books( i don't mind reading actually.. really!)
c. Pick up the bass guitar
d. Woo some girls for the fun of it(personal development indeed, life's getting too predictable)
e. Learn to cook better.

We think Denesh is gay

2007-06-28T17:18:00.000+08:00

A short meaningless post:

The date is Thursday, 28th June 2007. Nothing much happened, besides the fact we went to Devi's Bangsar for lunch and to Midvalley for some window shopping and foosball. Speaking of foos, AGAIN, *bitch mode* myself and shiv like toaaallyy beaat zamir's butt..don't count in Zehan and Denesh because they don't really play. So it's just your ass Zam ;) During the entire outing, Denesh kept hinting to us he just doesn't swing the way we men are meant to swing. Don't worry Denesh, your friends still love you anyway. I also got myself a brand new pair of Tama-oak drumsticks, with one eye on the double bass pedal (RM998 omg) on the store shelf. I NEED A JOB o.0

picture above:(denesh-shouldn't he be driving?!, shi von, myself)

The Face of The Day:

Always need more faces like these to brighten up your day lol.

of beer and foosball

2007-06-28T16:47:00.000+08:00

Last night, some friends and myself when to our spot near old town, PJ for some drinks. Its pretty damn cheap, RM4 a can for some nice imported beer you'd be hard-pressed to find in normal stores. Chang beer!! yeah. Nice Thai beer. Better than Anchor anyway. We "tapao-ed" the cans and went to a nearby park for a happy bonding session where everyone took turns to con chun wai(he's gullible, see) and get amused when seeing him looking blur and confused, asking "really ar? really really?". Things we do for fun sigh. Besides that, came all the usual conversation topics: relationships, and gays. Well, gays aren't always are the in-thing to talk about, but its funny to talk about it. Especially if we've had personal encounters =/. Well i'l stop there. After several cans we headed to AC(asia cafe) for some foosball. Turned out alcohol and foosball shouldn't be mixed. After several really bad games consisting of a lotta cursing and wasted balls we just gave up and went home. On the way back, Jennyung asked me if i needed help with a certain girl.. that he could help me "build a bridge". I just laughed it off. Kinda. Don't think i'd want a relationship for now, unless it's someone really worth it. Never did well with BGRs..despite my best efforts. Maybe i'm just unlucky..so any babes wanna help me change my luck? :p

Feelings

2007-06-27T01:41:00.000+08:00

What are feelings? Feelings are " An affective state of consciousness, such as that resulting from emotions, sentiments, or desires" (answers.com). So why is it that feelings play such a big role in our lives? Can it be controlled? Can it be inbred? Do feelings have a purpose? Even animals have feelings..they get angry, jealous and horny as well. Another question I'd like to ask: Are feelings beneficial? Do they help us survive as a species? One thing's for sure..Everybody deals with it, being either positive or negative. What about love? Among all the "common" types of feelings, love I guess is the most unpredictable and uncontrollable of them all. Stories like "I can't help it, I have feelings for this person", or "he/she's been such a fucked up person to me, yet I still love him/her" are all too common, especially at this age. Blogs everywhere are sorta dedicated to these topics even..it can be the only thing on our young minds sometimes. Is there a science of love? Is it just chemical reactions happening in your body that are designed to help us reproduce, survive, and enjoy a socially-fulfilling life? There are many opinions on this, even a Discovery Channel documentary covers this topic. Its so cool how love can make us absorb all the shit that gets thrown at us, or make us go crazy over little silly things..Nothing else can do that. Its not being referred only to romantic relationships, but other kinds as well. I guess what makes love so special is that it binds individuals together, and remains the most powerful, influential and strongest feeling in our lives. We just can't live without it can we..well. Writing this entry has made me feel so lovey all of a sudden. So I guess i'd like to take this moment as an oppurtunity to tell all my friends and family, especially the people around me, that I love them. You people have made my life what it is now, and I guess i can say its been a pretty good one. Awesome.

a friendster comment.

2007-06-25T23:35:00.000+08:00

A lighter post, compared to my others:
One fine day on friendster...

Petrina
Posted 24/06/2007 01:44
this fella ar..alone (in bed) with three girls, doesnt even make a move =p ure the man brian wong

This made me feel like really macho.
Then this came along.

naveen
Posted 24/06/2007 09:22
poyo player!!!! and brian likes guys i can prove it haha:D

Suddenly naveen's post made the entire scenario change from macho-ism to .. -.- yeah. The thing is, this naveen is a guy from college known to be unsure of his sexual orientation. Then he says he can prove i like guys. With a big smiley ":D" after that as well. Doesn't bode well for me. Its as if me and naveen..No. No no. As i stated earlier i do like females. Very much so, and it shouldn't be changing anytime soon. Sorry naveen, no offense to you of course :)

Monday Blues? not quite.

2007-06-25T22:14:00.000+08:00

I feel tired...very tired. But at the same time, I feel content. Content with what however I'm not sure. Am i sounding like a girl? Maybe. Normally though girls would feel moody instead of being content...and its likely they wouldn't be sure what they're moody about but they're moody anyway. Ring any bells? Today was a semi-eventful day I guess, especially the evening's bachelor session between myself, kahar, naveen and zam at zam's crib, celebrating singlehood and of course, manhood. When I stated celebrating manhood though I don't mean anything homo..it's quite the opposite actually. I guess I'm just happy with my friends, my day and my life. I'l appreciate this until it changes. However, it's sad to see what was once a happy relationship between two friends slowly deteriorate until there is nothing much but memories left. It's rather unfortunate though because both of them actually care about each other still, and love(in this case friendship) doesn't always prevail. All that rubbish only works in fiction. Which do you find harder to lose? A close friend, or your partner? It depends actually, but in my honest opinion i'd rather keep the friend(s). My opinion could change though.........

Tribute to a friend from India

2007-06-24T23:42:00.000+08:00

Last night, Navviitha Tharmalingam had a farewell dinner at her place. Yeah, she's one of the hordes of Malaysian students who have to go all over the world and to pay extravagantly for better education simply because the education standard here..well..sucks. Sad isn't it. Imagine how much better the country will fare if ALL of its graduates are employable. Brain drain, money drain, human resource drain..Malaysia is one big "longkang" when it comes to this. It used to be better..a long long time ago..I think. Wasn't it?I guess it changed when "nationalistic" pride took over. What the fuck happened. Anyway, Navvi. When i first saw her I only thought of her as some girl going around campus with her colossal face-fixing box (crate rather) and helping anyone who needs a face job. Navvi,the face fixer. After i got to know her a little better though, she happens to be a part-time model, occasionally appearing on local magazines.. and being the first machaa babe that is going to appear on hypertune magazine, which is dominated by chinese looking girls. Go India. I guess that explains her face-fixing expertise. As a friend, she's been as great as any, perhaps even more so. Thats makes it sad that she's leaving..No matter. I'l be joining her at Down Under in half a year, so i guess its no biggie. I'l miss her though. Kudos to our friendship my exotic friend :)

picture above: Denesh, Navvii, Rae, Me-after having a few beers(i'm not usually this red)

FOOSBALL - The healthy hobby, or money-eating addiction?

2007-06-24T16:03:00.000+08:00

For some of you who haven't noticed, there is an upcoming craze among youths in Malaysia. Klang Valley, at least. Yeap. Its foosball. Everywhere, foos parlours are becoming increasingly popular- breakers, Asia Cafe, .. even places like Riley's, which is nothing more than an illegal looking upstairs shophouse above a typical chinese coffeeshop can survive on the many 50 cent coins they get from the foos tables they have there. Why is it so popular? I USED to think that way. "foos? a game for posing noobs" yeah. However, after awhile i realized this game that apparently was for posing noobs is actually quite fun. AND im definitely not a posing noob. So therefore the game of foosball became quite cool after that :D. I play it soo much now, its addictive. I consider it a hobby, a table sport, something healthy, like ping pong...Right. The flip side to it is that there is ALOT of money spent- don't be fooled, RM2 a game might seem little but I know better, late nights out..I don't know. Is this good for me? At the moment though i don't care. Maybe its just a passing fancy.. like a crush on a girl.. or DOTA. Funny i should put girls and DOTA on the same level. No offence to you females though. I like females :).. Right. Foosball. Somebody stop me please.

Aural Joint's long-in-the-making EP

2007-06-24T15:47:00.000+08:00

yep. for those who still don't know what the hell is aural joint, it's my band, not some show or term involving blowjobs and ganja. Sounds kinky though. But then again, the band chose this name for its controversial ambiguity too. "WE'RE RECORDING NOW!!!" are the words i told a friend anticipating our CD about a month ago. Recently, the same friend asked if we were still recording. Yes, i said the same thing. What she didnt know however is that we're still stuck on the first of three upcoming songs. Unfortunately, our studio producer ALSO has a band which happens to be one of the country's best.. the pop-ular pop-shuvit, which makes him pretty busy...he has a knack for not being punctual and has brought the level of "FFK"ing to an entirely new level. We still love his work though. We might have to look for someone else come the next time the band records; i don't want our album to take 5 years to be done. We already have two recorded tracks, it can be accessed at http://amp.channelv.com/auraljoint. Ever the marketer. All support is greatly appreciated :)

POLIS DIRAJA MALAYSIA - royal indeed

2007-06-24T15:27:00.000+08:00

Don't we all just love these guys. They really do care for the Rakyat.. to the extent of giving us lucky citizens special discounted prices for summonses and little offenses here and there.. all for their own "benefit" of course. My foreign friend had a tough time trying to convince me in his native country rules ARE rules. On my part however, I had a even tougher time convincing him that in Malaysia rules..well..aren't rules. He might shake his head, but I, the happy Malaysian citizen who enjoys the special privileges of police bribery find it funny. Its even better if you get stopped and act like you cant speak malay..and have the satisfaction of watching these cops(whom most of them can only speak malay) try so damn hard to find the words to hint or ask for a bribe some just give up and let you go..unscathed. Wonderful. Damn foreigners have no idea how good it is here. Sadly though i still have 2 outstanding summonses to settle, which were given to me while i was NOT in the car. Wonder if i'l get lucky again?

Simplicity does wonders!

2007-06-24T15:02:00.000+08:00

Instead of having such a intricately complicating blog that takes an ENTIRE lifetime to load on some bad connection days, i think i'l keep it simple and straightforward, an easy to read, fast-loading page. After all, I doubt i'l publicize this blog much, so there's no need to show off my hitherto unsuspected creative graphical skills...AND i'm a simple guy..so there's also no need to appear sophisticated.. unlike some people who try just too hard (for appearance only, mind you)just to place themselves on top of the social hierachy. I like simple people. Don't you? They are easy to understand, easy to connect with, basically being easy people to live with. I just love praising myself sometimes. However, its true ain't it? But of course.. we always need drama in our lives to make things interesting for us. Nothing against you sophisticales of course. :)

Finally.

2007-06-24T14:23:00.000+08:00

After years of contemplating whether i should start a blog due to a predicted lack of commitment, laziness and lack of writing ideas, i finally did it. The reasons for this are that i just realized i have NOTHING to do at all online, besides being on msn, and friendster-ing, which is even worse, watching all those "no lifers" post meaningless bulletin after bulletin about their silly selves, then realizing that i'm not much better myself for even reading SOME of those dumb bulletins and being on friendster that often. Yes, I can be pathetic. Little wonder why i want to go out so much and often. Maybe my parents will one day thank me for blogging, perhaps it will help me enjoy home more. Even though i'm not home much, cept for meals.. and some sleep.. whenever i'm home, i'd be online. SOO i guess it does make perfect sense for me to start a blog to not waste so much time being online and er.. hone my writing skills. Right.